You have got to be shittin' me.

Hey hey what can i say, crapity crap da crap da crap shit.

So im switching my major to nothing. Im actually to major in nothing and minor in a little bitt a something, but just a step up from nothing. So i guess you can say I'm just stinkin around. Oh, did i tell you that college sucks? Yea it does, the work sucks, and i don't care about anything at the moment. I like being home, being in milwaukee just depresses me sometimes. What? My pictures don't look depressing? Oh young turtle toad, those pictures are drunk-ctures. Of couse I'm happy, I'm out on the town. Yes Town.

So, not playing sports makes me depressed, and I missed intramural sign up at milwaukee. What i meant was everything is working out perfectly and its going great and perfect and great. Great actually.

So i pretty much go into every situation with guns a' blaizn' and arms akimbo because I like to be aggressive. I feel like nothing really goes in the way I think it should so , gotta make it a little spicy or sassy, if the outcome is the same. Might as well do it he fun and sun way. Sundrop, make it pop , pop lock and drop it , drop it the floor ya boom.

Where's is the beach.

FB stands for more than Facebook and Fuck Buddy....

It also stands for FACE BROWNIE!

This is just a fun pump-up ritual that I do. It pumps me up. Its like a pre game for everything. I like to do this before I

-Skype
-Talk to someone important
-Go to the bathroom
-My food before I eat it
-Put on my glasses


That is just a short list of face brownie appropriate moments.

It really exfoliates the skin and degreases your face. It has built in botanicals to enrich the nutrients in your dermis. It rejuvenates your pyruvates while intensifying your melanin.

It does it all, who wouldn't want it all. Bar brawl, bar crawl, use it on a fat owl.

I am so glad im so ugly with my ugly hair and ugly self with my non-friends

So.

Apparently.

I learned, today, within these last 12 hours, I learned about all my apparent unattractive features. Thanks to my friends, they just lift me up, like flyleaf, but better.  Better than an hot air balloon. Better than a zip lock bag. Its relevant. Did you know curly hair is ugly? Well I do now and so you do! Thank you for enlightening me today in the student union, its enlightenment center!....of enlightenment!

So Koty left for mars today, at least he can have his phone and internet while he is on mars. Today I texted him after he left saying:

"I just talked to my good friend Obama, and he agreed to discharge you from the military completely because I asked and that would happen and work so yea you can come back now"

So now I'm back to square one. The first square. One Squared.

I think im just going to propose my life to MTV to make a reality show. I think it would be very entertaining, we could call it Riverview Shore.

Im going to eat this brownie...right ....about......fart.......now!

Green Green Green Machine.....Shashine.

Keepin it green, going green is what I'm doing, thats where I am , thats who I am, what about slam, and thats Sam I am.

Today after grammatically correct and spelling error free exam, I went back to my dorm to start slaving away on 2/15ths of an assignment. It didn't take me 46 hours, that it did not do so don't say it did because i was there and I have Aunt Sil as a witness so she can testify in a court of slaves.

Cheezits, thats what I eat. Oh speaking of Beats, I told Aunt Sil to download David Guettas latest album called "Nothing But Beats". To Aunt Sil's disappointment there were no actually beets involved in the making of this album. She wanted a song about beets, god.

In addition to this day, Aunt Sil and I had several dance parties that resulted in embarrassing christmas party photos. They should be kept in King Tuts tomb, they are that sacred. 

So I keep adding cans to the bathroom, obviously. But today Hippy came in my room and asked if he could throw all of them away. I was offended. I was disturbed. His face was about to be curbed. Blurb. How could he even think about thinking about throwing those cans away. I told him to leave them there, or beware of the dungeon dragon.

What were I saying about candy porn?

Above is just a little nemonic device I use. What it really is, is a card from my sister. Nicki Minaj. I can't reveal the content of this card just yet, because it is to sacred and deserves its own blog and analysis.

Did you want to have a dance party in a lounge on a floor that you don't live on?

Did you want to slam your ass into the window?

Did you want to cannon ball into the love sack?

Did you want to dance-chase people down a hallway that you don't know?

Did you want to though


Oh and I'm cutting the cakeeee when no ones hereeeee

30 seconds to lard

I just burned down the union, so nobody has to worry about it anymore.

The internet kept kicking me off, so I called in reinforcements to blow the bitch up. So I evacuated and I walked away from it as it exploded. It was just like the movies. You could probably insert a pitbull song in there too.

There was a guy sitting near me in the union a few minutes ago who had purple hair. Thats new, and interesting.

Oh, so I can see the building I need to be in in approximately 11 minutes from now, but I don't want to walk there. The hurricane force winds are really what I'm looking forward to. So i think instead of walking to the building I'm just going to blow through the roof like superman and fly there. Because that would happen, and work.

All up on you, y'know you wanna clone it.

Im going to start by saying that this day thus far was thoroughly planned and there was no confusion of any kind.

Apparently, today is not Tuesday. Its not Tuesday until tomorrow. First problem, when you set your alarm for 9:20 thinking its Tuesday because your class obviously starts at 10, you will miss your 9:30 class because it is in fact Monday. Not Tuesday.

After becoming immediately stressed out that I missed the class, I reset my alarm for 10 so I could get up and around for my 11 o'clock class. So I awaken from my beauty sleep of 4 hours total to get ready for the rest of my classes. After a shuttle ride taking longer than a trip to the moon, I'm finally at the union. I start walking to my math class and I notice a few people that are in my class at 11 walking away from the union. Thats weird, we have class in 10 minutes. I get all the way up to the room to see a note posted stating "Math 90 sections will not meet today, Julie" 

There was no insta-rage.

If I wasn't so retarded, and checked my email like I do EVERY morning, I would have seen that there was no class being held by JULIEGENSRICK today. 

I think today was an overall success so far, and can't wait to see what happens next.

Oh I got hit in the face with the zipper of someone's jacket on the shuttle. Then I beat them.

Im drinking green tea.